How to Avoid Setting a Precedent in Paying Child Support Without a Court Order

During a divorce or legal separation, it may be a while before there are temporary -- or permanent -- orders put into place as to how the non-custodial parent is to financially care for his children. Child support payments are typically not figured out first in a divorce or separation, and are determined near the end of your divorce. Therefore, there may be an extended period of time where nothing is determined in terms of the financial responsibilities of both parents and their children. However, you can avoid making some simple mistakes which can set you up for extremely expensive child support payments in the future.

• Understand that the courts function off of "precedents." If something has worked well for an extended period of time, the courts will typically make orders accordingly.
• Avoid paying too much to your spouse during this unsettling time. Some parents want to do the right thing and help out, but precedents may end up leaving a parent with higher child support payments than they can continue to afford. You may end up paying more than the courts would end up calculating with their standard child support calculations.
• Space out your payments and keep them irregular, recommends the author of the "Fathers' Rights Protection System." This shows that you are at least giving some money to your former spouse to help them out with the children, but that you are helping as you can and not necessarily on a strict schedule. This is important if you're afraid the judge is going to order child support in high amounts, in which you may have difficulties getting it lowered in the future.

Getting child support payments lowered through the courts typically requires you to prove a substantial change in circumstances. This is why it is important to get your child support payments set to a reasonable amount from the start to avoid more expenses and court drama when you find you are unable to support yourself, let alone your children.


Learn more at fathershelphotline.com!

What Happens During the Adoption Process if You're Left Out of the Paternity?

So here's a scenario for you--say you had a fling with a married woman.  You found out she was pregnant, she says you need to break up.  Down the road, you find out that she had the baby, and her and her husband signed the papers to allow the child to be adopted.  You have an inkling that the child was yours--what do you do now?

One Ohio father did what any biological father would want to do--he filed with the courts to establish paternity of the child, and then fought for his son back from the adoptive parents--three years after the baby boy was born.

The biological mother claimed her husband as the father--however, due to divorce, her and her husband signed over papers to allow the baby boy to be adopted--all of this was done without the true father's consent, and even though it is years later, he has the right to take his child back.

Read this man's story on ParentDish--and decide for yourself--when adoption agencies collect and gather information about the parents of the baby, should they do a paternity test as well to establish them as the true parents to avoid situations such as this one?

Trend of 50/50 Custody is Growing

Holly Davis, a family lawyer in Austin, Texas, has released information that shows that 50/50 joint physical custody is becoming a more popular trend in America today.

"You're definitely seeing more 50/50 custody situations, and I think that's attributed in large part to changing gender roles," says Davis.  "More women are pursuing careers, and more men are choosing to focus on their children."

This is a great thing to hear; however, it does not mean that 50/50 physical custody arrangements are a good fit for every family.  Some circumstances may make it difficult or impossible, such as location of the parents, the communicative abilities of both parents, and the willingness for each parent to be a positive influence on the children instead of causing arguments and negative energy whenever the kids are dropped off or picked up by the other parent.  Just like there is no cookie-cutter divorce, there will never be a cookie-cutter custody arrangement that works for every family.

Read more about Holly Davis' findings on PRWeb.com!

Father Gets Rights by Judge to Baptize his Child in the Catholic Church

A huge step in courtroom rulings happened last week—a judge ruled that a father from Illinois could have his child baptized within the Catholic church, which was the religion that he was raised with. This happened after an extended court battle with his ex-wife during their divorce case. This is an amazing step for courts, and now this brings up the question of how much a judge can intervene when it comes to the religious upbringing of children of divorce.


Read more about this story at PRNewsWire.com regarding this successful breakthrough in the courts for fathers’ rights!

WCCO Article Discussing the Shift in Family Courts

When it comes to divorce and custody cases in the family law courtroom, it seems that there has been a substantial shift that gives fathers a new "edge" against their wives when it comes to getting custody of their children.  

Minnesota's WCCO News anchor Jason DeRusha recently delved into the amazing shift happening in family law courtrooms, the fact that judges are loosening up in terms of their "biased" favoritism of women who come forward, wanting sole custody of their children.

Pamela Waggoner of the Minnesota Bar Association, stated, "I think it's a reflection of a change in society. You no longer have the traditional family unit where there's one breadwinner and one stay at home parent. Right now, you have two people -- where both people work,"  No longer can anyone rule in favor of the "tender years doctrine," which claimed younger children were automatically better off with their mother due to the care-taking responsibilities that mothers once had as stay-at-home moms and homemakers.

To read more about this amazing breakthrough in family law, check out the WCCO article by Jason DeRusha here.

"Why? Because She Wears a Skirt and I Don't." -Bob Norton, MA

Bob Norton
clevelenterprises.com

Bob Norton of Massachuessets has been burned in the past with a horrible divorce that resulted in little, limited custody with his children.  His divorce has left him to file bankruptcy, give up his pre-marital home, and also left him in the situation of an unfair court order for child custody and visitation.  As he stated in his video taken during the ACFC (American Coalition for Fathers and Children) Conference on September 15, 2006:

"And so now I see my children about two hours a week under supervised visitation because my wife, who has had a 15-year emotional instability history and psychiatric treatment and is on drugs for mood control, suffers from four or five different symptoms and conditions that sometimes converge, has complete control of my children.  Why?  Because she wears a skirt and I don't.  That's how the systems work today--the judges are overloaded, they rubber stamp, they go to lunch, and that's a higher priority than getting justice and getting whats best for the children."  (See YouTube video below for full audio)

Recently, there has been news from Boston.com that Massachusetts State Senator Cynthia Creem has been "attacked" by Bob Norton, who runs and maintains the website FathersUnite.org.  He has reportedly been distributing flyers around the area that claim Creem is attempting to "block legislation that would reform state alimony laws."  This comes about because she is also a divorce attorney, and the purpose of the flyer is to encourage others to not vote for Creem during the September primaries.  She claims that the information on the flyer is untrue, is not based on any fact, and although disparaging, is looking forward to running for re-election for the 13th year as state Senate.

Ricard Martinez of Racine, Wisconsin Camps Outside Courthouse to Encourage Others to Join for Fathers' Rights Rally

JournalTimes.com photo, Ricardo
Martinez stands up for fathers' rights!

Let down by the courthouse a number of times in his own divorce and fathers' rights case, Ricardo Martinez, 34, of Racine, Wisconsin is now unemployed, homeless, and rallying for his kids from outside the Racine County Courthouse.  He's been burned by the courthouse, as have other fathers before him, when it comes to custody and visitation of his kids, and he's not going to take it quietly!

("Father Camping Out by Courthouse, Advertising Rally" Article by JournalTimes.com can be found here)

Wednesday, August 18th, 2010, outside of the Racine County Courthouse at 9 a.m., 730 Washington Avenue, Martinez will be joined by at least 150 fathers protesting the courthouse for their choice in distanting fathers from their children.  In fact, Martinez also rallied back in March by carrying a homemade wooden cross around the courthouse for a week.

All I have to say is, GO RICARDO!  If enough fathers step up to the plate to have their voices heard, perhaps the courts will understand that parenting is a two-person job, and requires BOTH the Mother and the Father to have equal time and justice!

Divorce Court 101: How to Avoid Becoming a By-Stander in Your Own Legal Case

Many times, fathers feel like whatever the judge says, goes. This is not the case. In fact, too many fathers become by-standers in their own divorce case. And here's why.

First off, you need to full understand how family law works. By being familiar with how the courtroom works and sitting in on some family law hearings, you will only then begin to truly understand the court system and how judges react to divorce cases. This can be especially helpful if you sit in on family law hearings being overseen by the same judge that is handling your divorce case. This way, you have a little insight as to how the judge operates, and can use these observations in your favor while in court with your ex-wife.

Second, remember that no matter what the judge decides, it's not the final say by any means. In fact, when you're dealing with the court system, you need to remember that it's all about pushing the paperwork--and that means appealing any decision the judge has made that does not lie in your favor. In essence, you're creating what I like to call a "Paper Blizzard." This is when you basically file paperwork for every little thing, which in turn creates more paperwork for your ex-wife and her attorney, which can increase the financial--and emotional--stress and costs on the opposing side. This can sometimes help you level the playing field with your ex, and make her understand that you won't be backing down anytime soon. This can help increase the chances that a settlement will be agreed upon, or that negotiation will help resolve most of the issues that are being dragged into the courtroom.

By pushing the paperwork and showing the judge and opposing counsel that you are going to be persistent in pursuing the results that you want from the courts, you will help assist your father's rights case and help push it in the direction of continued potential and success.

Are you looking to fight for your fathers' rights in court?  Get a free case analysis by Dennis Gac at http://www.fathershelphotline.com and help get yourself on track for a successful fathers' rights case!

One Father Speaks Out About His Struggles With The Courtroom and Fathers' Rights

Rodney Gehly wrote the "Father's Rights Song" that was recently posted on YouTube for all to enjoy.  It talks about the struggles with what's really, truly right and in the best interest of the children, and speaks from the heart.

I wrote this song awhile back when I was in the middle of a divorce. I feel very fortunate that I have joint custody of my two sons. I was amazed at the blatant, open discrimination that fathers face in our so-called "justice" system. Every divorced father that I speak with seems to have a horror story to tell regarding their financial and custody arrangement handed down by a judge.

What's even more amazing is that this corrupt system continues every day here in America. Women are very hype to how this system works and file for a "protective order" or "restraining order" merely as a tactic to gain custody of the children...which also by default will gain her the home and child support. A woman can commit adultery and still be awarded everything in court. As long as judges keep rewarding the bad behavior of some women...the more this manipulation will continue.

"No Fault" divorce is not working and a very big part of the problem. What would happen if we took this concept of "No Fault" into the business world?  You could simply choose not to honor any contracts signed. The business world would fall apart overnight. Guess what?..that's what has happened in the "marriage" world and it has fallen apart. Our court system is basically a cash cow for low life attorneys, biased judges, and bad women.  

I want to state that I appreciate the many good women that love God and their families. And I hope you enjoy the song...it's meant to encourage fathers to not give up.

This song is for every man out there that feels as though they have hit rock bottom in the courtrooms, that feel as though the system is not on their side, and who are looking for that light at the end of the tunnel.  Enjoy!

Welcome to the Fathers' Rights Help blog!

Thank you for visiting the Fathers' Rights Help Blog, started and maintained by one of the world's premier fathers' rights mentors, Dennis Gac.

When it comes to fighting for your rights as a father in the courtrooms, whether it be gaining custody of your child and setting up child support payments from an ex-girlfriend or fighting your ex-wife for visitation or custody of your children from your marriage, Dennis Gac can help advise you as to how to find success in the courtroom, regardless of the "pro-Mother" courtroom and family law.

This blog will be a constant and continual source of information for fathers looking to gain custody of their kids, increase their visitation, or for anyone looking to help someone that they know that is losing their battle in the courtroom.  We will include up-to-date information on changing custody arrangements allowed in family law, tips and techniques to help you find success in the courtroom, and even common questions and answers that fathers (and the ones that love them) tend to ask during legal battles.

We hope that you continue to visit the Fathers' Rights Help Blog (conveniently located at fathersrightshelpblog.com--bookmark it now!), and follow it regularly to ensure you have the latest information and the positive techniques and tricks that you can use in order to succeed in the courtroom and get the chance to enjoy fatherhood to its fullest!

Dennis Gac
Founder of the National Brotherhood of Fathers' Rights
http://www.fathershelphotline.com