How to Settle a Child Custody Case Outside of the Courtroom

Child custody cases can get ugly. When a married couple seeks divorce, children can sometimes be at the root of the issue. Custody issues can cause each parent to use the children as a pawn to get what he or she wants. Sometimes, each parent wants full custody of their child, which causes a long, extended battle in the courtroom. But this doesn't always have to be the case. There are ways to settle your child custody case outside of the courthouse, and to work amicably between you and your soon-to-be former spouse.

• Write your spouse a settlement letter near the beginning of your divorce case. Lay out what you feel is important in regards to the children. Write the settlement letter in a friendly, informative and caring tone, and explain your reasons for wanting the custody arrangement that you are seeking (joint? sole?).
• Use modern day technologies to talk out custody issues, utilizing email and phone text messages which can be documented for court. It is important to document everything as much as possible--oral agreements will not hold up in court. However, if you conduct civil discussions regarding child custody through email, you will be able to put thought and consideration into what you are requesting. In addition, you will also have documented proof of any agreements your spouse decides he or she is willing to work with you on. This will prove helpful if you and your spouse still end up in the courtroom arguing over custody, because you will have documented proof as to what he or she agreed on. This will help you solidify what you were both willing to work out in regards to the child.
• Negotiate with a mediator. Instead of taking your case to court where you may feel highly intimidated and stressed, you can always request mediation with your spouse in regards to your child custody case. Mediators are third-party advocates that sit with parents and helps them determine what is in the best interests of the children.
• Mediating and negotiating your child custody case, along with child support, outside the courtroom is faster and less costly than going through the courts.

Find more helpful articles and tips at http://www.fathershelphotline.com!

How to Get the IRS to Pay Your Child Support

Child support, as determined by the courts, can sometimes be a heavy financial burden for the non-custodial parent. It's considered a necessary evil, even though it can keep the non-custodial parent from living a comfortable lifestyle for themselves. There are, however, some ways to get the IRS to "help" with your child support payments, in addition to finding a way to get the child exemptions every year for your tax return to help ease the burden of paying financial support to your ex all year round.

• Ask for the tax exemptions for the children every year. IRS tax code states that you can claim a child if it lives with you for over half the year, or 183 days out of the year. However, if you have a court order that states the exemptions are yours regardless, than the court order "trumps" the IRS code. When in the courtroom determining custody, or while working on the parenting plan with your former spouse, consider asking for the tax exemptions every year. This will help get you money back through a refund to help balance out the amount you owed in child support all year.

• Provide medical benefits to your children. In some cases, you can write off the expenses of medical care through your taxes at the end of the year. This can help you tremendously if your former spouse pays half of medical expenses, and you are able to claim the full amount on your own taxes if you initially paid the bills and then were reimbursed by your former spouse for the other half of the medical expenses. This can help increase your refund come tax time.
• Combine your child support and alimony together at "maintenance." Child support is not tax deductible, but alimony is, and it is paid with pre-tax dollars. It counts as a deduction to you as the payor and as income to the payee. This is a simple way to write off what you pay to your former spouse each month through your taxes, and get relief through the IRS.

How to Get the IRS to Pay Your Child Support

Child support, as determined by the courts, can sometimes be a heavy financial burden for the non-custodial parent. It's considered a necessary evil, even though it can keep the non-custodial parent from living a comfortable lifestyle for themselves. There are, however, some ways to get the IRS to "help" with your child support payments, in addition to finding a way to get the child exemptions every year for your tax return to help ease the burden of paying financial support to your ex all year round.

* Ask for the tax exemptions for the children every year. IRS tax code states that you can claim a child if it lives with you for over half the year, or 183 days out of the year. However, if you have a court order that states the exemptions are yours regardless, than the court order "trumps" the IRS code. When in the courtroom determining custody, or while working on the parenting plan with your former spouse, consider asking for the tax exemptions every year. This will help get you money back through a refund to help balance out the amount you owed in child support all year.


* Provide medical benefits to your children. In some cases, you can write off the expenses of medical care through your taxes at the end of the year. This can help you tremendously if your former spouse pays half of medical expenses, and you are able to claim the full amount on your own taxes if you initially paid the bills and then were reimbursed by your former spouse for the other half of the medical expenses. This can help increase your refund come tax time.


* Combine your child support and alimony together at "maintenance." Child support is not tax deductible, but alimony is, and it is paid with pre-tax dollars. It counts as a deduction to you as the payor and as income to the payee. This is a simple way to write off what you pay to your former spouse each month through your taxes, and get relief through the IRS.

Find more tips and tricks in the Fathers' Rights Protection System by Dennis Gac!

Understanding a Financial Power of Attorney

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A financial power of attorney (or POA) is giving another person or agent the authority to make financial decisions on their behalf. Normally, people get nervous over this thought. However, a person can assess the need of a financial power of attorneybased on his current lifestyle.

In doing this, there are valid reasons to consider for an issuance of a POA. A need must be determined before doing this. It must be noted that a power of attorney is a legal document that allows someone to conduct/implement business on your behalf. Therefore, confidence and trust to the person issued a power of attorney must be ensured. A power of attorney may come in as financial and medical.

A medical power of attorney must be have a specific information on who can make medical decisions in times that someone becomes incapacitated. During times of incapacity, this person will make decisions for you as you not able to make valid decisions for yourself. However, experts advise that financial powers of attorney should not include medical information.

On the other hand, a financial POA has two types, the durable and the non-durable. The difference of these two types of power of attorney must be very clear to the person doing this. In most cases, people use the durable powers of attorney in the event that a chronic illness is being involved or the future when it will be foreseen that such illness can be disruptive to the person. Regardless of what purpose there is, a person must ensure his security before issuing a POA.

Specific Case Law Examples for Your Fathers' Rights Custody Case

When it comes to writing a compelling court argument, it is important that you reference certain case law and past cases that have dealt with similar issues. Here is a quick list of cases to reference and research further into to help you in pursuing your custody case pro se, whether you're on the defense or the offense:

Jarrett v. Jarrett (1982) 102 S. Ct 1388 - If dealing with an ex-wife that is attempting to terminate your rights as a father.

Craig v. Boren. 429 U.S. 190, 197-199 (1976) - Proof that the courts cannot subject men and women to disparate treatment. This case states that men and women cannot be treated unequally.

Roe v. Wade. 410 U.S. 113 (1972), 162-63 - Regarding the fundamental rights a parent has to care for their children.

Dunn v. Blumstein, 405 U.S. 330, 342 - Can be paired with the above Roe v. Wade as it is additional case law regarding fundamental rights of parents.

Pierce v. Society of Sisters, 268 U.S. 510, 534-35 (1925) - Case that proved fathers should be free from unreasonable State interference when raising their child/children.

Lehr v. Robertson 463 U.S. 248. *264: 103 S. Ct. 2985 - In regards to existence of substantial relationship as criterion in best interests of the child.

Meyer v. Nebraska, 262 U.S. 390, 399 (1923) - Proving the right the conceive and raise one's child

May v. Andersen. 345 U.S. 528. 533 (1953) - Proves that father's "rights far more precious...than property rights" when it comes to raising their children.

A little research into these case law references may help you with your father's rights case. There are a number of important cases, both locally and federally, that may assist you in protecting your rights as a father.

Dennis Gac is widely known as "The World's premier fathers rights Consultant!" But why would you care? Well, I'll tell you if you rush over to his site... I think you'll come to your own conclusion that he "IS" the real deal! Experience someone who works and thinks outside the box for you! Read what others have to say at.... http://www.fathershelphotline.com/.

UK Dads Dress as Superheroes to Combat the Child Support Agency

Stourbridgenews.co.uk

Costumes aren't just for Halloween--they're for superheroes, too--superheroes like fathers!

A number of dads from the "New Fathers 4 Justice" group stood outside the Child Support Agency in Waterfront dressed as Superman, Batman, and even the pope to help make a point--fathers deserve better rights to their children, and the chance to be dads.  

Read more about the demonstration at Stourbridge News!

The Growing Trend of Stay-at-Home Dads

Who says its all up to the woman to cook, clean, and care for the kids?  These days, the growing trend of stay-at-home daddies is continuing to rise, despite the economy.

There are many reasons why stay-at-home dads are on the rise.  In this story posted by Conducive Chronicle, one particular stay-at-home dad in this article was faced with a layoff due to the company he worked for going bankrupt.  His partner was climbing the corporate ladder, but was being held back with the stress of raising children and caring for the home.  They easily switched roles and haven't been happier!

Another situation describes a father who took paternity leave, and ended up never going back to work.  As he stated, "I had the better temperament and my wife had a much better job."

This reversal in gender roles is embraced by many, but questioned by some.  Aren't mothers the "nurturers?"  The men are supposed to be "hunter/gatherers" while the women are supposed to "prepare the food and care for the children."  ...right?  Wrong.  This modern society brings about a whole new group of stay-at-home parents, and you never know when you could be the next Mr. Mom!

Read more about the growing trend of stay-at-home dads at Conducive Chronicle.

Father Gets Rights by Judge to Baptize his Child in the Catholic Church

A huge step in courtroom rulings happened last week—a judge ruled that a father from Illinois could have his child baptized within the Catholic church, which was the religion that he was raised with. This happened after an extended court battle with his ex-wife during their divorce case. This is an amazing step for courts, and now this brings up the question of how much a judge can intervene when it comes to the religious upbringing of children of divorce.


Read more about this story at PRNewsWire.com regarding this successful breakthrough in the courts for fathers’ rights!

Chicago-based Father Fights for Custody from Non-Related Couple

Earlzell Orr, the father of an 11-year-old boy in Chicago, Illinois, is headed to court today to fight for custody from a non-related couple that gained temporary, emergency custody after the death of his mother. 

Orr is fighting to get custody of his son since the court has not yet granted temporary or permanent possession of the child, but yet they have access to the mother's bank accounts which is where the child support payments have been deposited.  One of the adults given emergency custody is also a convicted felon, and attorneys specializing in fathers' rights are petitioning for custody on behalf of Orr.

Our thoughts are with Orr as he fights for what he rightfully deserves--his son!

For more information regarding this court date, see the full press release here.

WCCO Article Discussing the Shift in Family Courts

When it comes to divorce and custody cases in the family law courtroom, it seems that there has been a substantial shift that gives fathers a new "edge" against their wives when it comes to getting custody of their children.  

Minnesota's WCCO News anchor Jason DeRusha recently delved into the amazing shift happening in family law courtrooms, the fact that judges are loosening up in terms of their "biased" favoritism of women who come forward, wanting sole custody of their children.

Pamela Waggoner of the Minnesota Bar Association, stated, "I think it's a reflection of a change in society. You no longer have the traditional family unit where there's one breadwinner and one stay at home parent. Right now, you have two people -- where both people work,"  No longer can anyone rule in favor of the "tender years doctrine," which claimed younger children were automatically better off with their mother due to the care-taking responsibilities that mothers once had as stay-at-home moms and homemakers.

To read more about this amazing breakthrough in family law, check out the WCCO article by Jason DeRusha here.

Best-Selling Author Louis de Bernieres Shares his Story of Despair

Louisdebernieres.co.uk

Known for penning the book "Captain Corelli's Mandolin," Louis de Bernieres has come public about how his recent family split has caused him a great deal of depression and despair due to his limited access to his children.

Living in the United Kingdom, de Bernieres revealed the pain and depression his parter Cathy Gill caused him after taking custody of their two children, ages five and two, and limiting the access he had to them.  This led him to become a patron of Families Need Fathers (or FNF).

In an article with Emily Andrews, de Bernieres states:

"It was really dreadful...the worst thing, practically, was finding the house so quiet, because it was always so full of laughter and rampaging and stampeding.  There was always a lot of noise and fun, and it suddenly went quiet...the emotional desolation is hard to describe.  There were many times when I felt suicidal.  One of the most extreme things you feel is a fantastically deep, bitter, anger at being treated so outrageously."

This is a perfect example of the rights fathers need and should have in the courtroom when it comes to their children.  The effect of losing one's children can be devastating, and de Bernieres is publicly speaking out about how the break up affect not only the kids but him as a father.

Rob Hahn's Candidacy Lost Due to Restraining Order Issued During Divorce?

RobBobforGov.com

Rob Hahn, resident of St. Paul and former candidate for governor, recently lost his Independence Party campaign against competitor Tom Horner.  To some, this comes as no surprise, after he spread the information of his restraining order against his wife during their divorce case one year back.  Hahn was recently interviewed by Gail Rosenblum of the Star Tribune, and confessed to his mistake and lack of anger management in the situation:

"It was a horrible mistake that I want to help others going through similar situations avoid making...ironically, I'm in a good position to do so because of my own experiences."

In his interview with Rosenblum, he continued to talk about how what he did was not okay, and the steps he has taken in anger management to help him better prepare himself for other stressful situations that may arise.

Dayton, Ohio Adoption Case Strengthening Father's Rights for their Children

In Dayton, Ohio, one case regarding an adopted two-year-old girl has brought national attention to adoption rules and how the "system" works when it comes to a father's rights to their children and their ability to stop adoption proceedings that occur without their okay.

The article from The Columbus Dispatch quotes Susan Eisenman, an adoption lawyer from the Upper Arlington area: "I don't think it's hit people yet just how persuasive this might be...if the guy doesn't want the adoption to go forward, all he has to do is file a paternity suit."

This might be a big step for fathers' rights in the eyes of the adoption industry.  Read more here!

--National Brotherhood of Fathers' Rights

Ricard Martinez of Racine, Wisconsin Camps Outside Courthouse to Encourage Others to Join for Fathers' Rights Rally

JournalTimes.com photo, Ricardo
Martinez stands up for fathers' rights!

Let down by the courthouse a number of times in his own divorce and fathers' rights case, Ricardo Martinez, 34, of Racine, Wisconsin is now unemployed, homeless, and rallying for his kids from outside the Racine County Courthouse.  He's been burned by the courthouse, as have other fathers before him, when it comes to custody and visitation of his kids, and he's not going to take it quietly!

("Father Camping Out by Courthouse, Advertising Rally" Article by JournalTimes.com can be found here)

Wednesday, August 18th, 2010, outside of the Racine County Courthouse at 9 a.m., 730 Washington Avenue, Martinez will be joined by at least 150 fathers protesting the courthouse for their choice in distanting fathers from their children.  In fact, Martinez also rallied back in March by carrying a homemade wooden cross around the courthouse for a week.

All I have to say is, GO RICARDO!  If enough fathers step up to the plate to have their voices heard, perhaps the courts will understand that parenting is a two-person job, and requires BOTH the Mother and the Father to have equal time and justice!

Finally, One Country GETS IT!

I'm appalled that the United States court has NOT had such a positive ruling for fathers like Germany has recently put into place.  As stated in this article on this website, "Germany's constitutional court gave unmarried fathers greater custodial powers...when judges said the current law violates basic parental rights."

"The constitutional judges said there was nothing wrong with initially granting custody to the mother if a child is born out of wedlock; however, they said it infringed on the father's rights if he had no legal recourse to challenge that decision or request joint custody."

Finally, someone GETS IT!  Read more about this story here, and lets continue to fight in the US for the same parental rights deemed appropriate for Germany.  If it's good enough for Germany, it's good enough for us!

National Brotherhood of Fathers' Rights is on Facebook! Come Join Us!

As some of you may have already noticed, we're on Facebook!  Please, check us out, "like" us, and spread the love to your friends--invite everyone you know that believes that both parents are best to join our cause!  Fathers have rights, too, and the more people know, the more they will understand the importance of fatherhood in every child's life!  Hopefully, down the line, we can all band together to eliminate sexism in the courtroom and show that a child with their father in their lives is the best possible outcome of any divorce!  Click the link below to go to our Facebook fan page to "like" us and share with the ones you love!

National Brotherhood of Fathers' Rights on Facebook!

Thank you for your continued support!

Divorce Court 101: How to Avoid Becoming a By-Stander in Your Own Legal Case

Many times, fathers feel like whatever the judge says, goes. This is not the case. In fact, too many fathers become by-standers in their own divorce case. And here's why.

First off, you need to full understand how family law works. By being familiar with how the courtroom works and sitting in on some family law hearings, you will only then begin to truly understand the court system and how judges react to divorce cases. This can be especially helpful if you sit in on family law hearings being overseen by the same judge that is handling your divorce case. This way, you have a little insight as to how the judge operates, and can use these observations in your favor while in court with your ex-wife.

Second, remember that no matter what the judge decides, it's not the final say by any means. In fact, when you're dealing with the court system, you need to remember that it's all about pushing the paperwork--and that means appealing any decision the judge has made that does not lie in your favor. In essence, you're creating what I like to call a "Paper Blizzard." This is when you basically file paperwork for every little thing, which in turn creates more paperwork for your ex-wife and her attorney, which can increase the financial--and emotional--stress and costs on the opposing side. This can sometimes help you level the playing field with your ex, and make her understand that you won't be backing down anytime soon. This can help increase the chances that a settlement will be agreed upon, or that negotiation will help resolve most of the issues that are being dragged into the courtroom.

By pushing the paperwork and showing the judge and opposing counsel that you are going to be persistent in pursuing the results that you want from the courts, you will help assist your father's rights case and help push it in the direction of continued potential and success.

Are you looking to fight for your fathers' rights in court?  Get a free case analysis by Dennis Gac at http://www.fathershelphotline.com and help get yourself on track for a successful fathers' rights case!

Welcome to the Fathers' Rights Help blog!

Thank you for visiting the Fathers' Rights Help Blog, started and maintained by one of the world's premier fathers' rights mentors, Dennis Gac.

When it comes to fighting for your rights as a father in the courtrooms, whether it be gaining custody of your child and setting up child support payments from an ex-girlfriend or fighting your ex-wife for visitation or custody of your children from your marriage, Dennis Gac can help advise you as to how to find success in the courtroom, regardless of the "pro-Mother" courtroom and family law.

This blog will be a constant and continual source of information for fathers looking to gain custody of their kids, increase their visitation, or for anyone looking to help someone that they know that is losing their battle in the courtroom.  We will include up-to-date information on changing custody arrangements allowed in family law, tips and techniques to help you find success in the courtroom, and even common questions and answers that fathers (and the ones that love them) tend to ask during legal battles.

We hope that you continue to visit the Fathers' Rights Help Blog (conveniently located at fathersrightshelpblog.com--bookmark it now!), and follow it regularly to ensure you have the latest information and the positive techniques and tricks that you can use in order to succeed in the courtroom and get the chance to enjoy fatherhood to its fullest!

Dennis Gac
Founder of the National Brotherhood of Fathers' Rights
http://www.fathershelphotline.com