How to Settle a Child Custody Case Outside of the Courtroom

Child custody cases can get ugly. When a married couple seeks divorce, children can sometimes be at the root of the issue. Custody issues can cause each parent to use the children as a pawn to get what he or she wants. Sometimes, each parent wants full custody of their child, which causes a long, extended battle in the courtroom. But this doesn't always have to be the case. There are ways to settle your child custody case outside of the courthouse, and to work amicably between you and your soon-to-be former spouse.

• Write your spouse a settlement letter near the beginning of your divorce case. Lay out what you feel is important in regards to the children. Write the settlement letter in a friendly, informative and caring tone, and explain your reasons for wanting the custody arrangement that you are seeking (joint? sole?).
• Use modern day technologies to talk out custody issues, utilizing email and phone text messages which can be documented for court. It is important to document everything as much as possible--oral agreements will not hold up in court. However, if you conduct civil discussions regarding child custody through email, you will be able to put thought and consideration into what you are requesting. In addition, you will also have documented proof of any agreements your spouse decides he or she is willing to work with you on. This will prove helpful if you and your spouse still end up in the courtroom arguing over custody, because you will have documented proof as to what he or she agreed on. This will help you solidify what you were both willing to work out in regards to the child.
• Negotiate with a mediator. Instead of taking your case to court where you may feel highly intimidated and stressed, you can always request mediation with your spouse in regards to your child custody case. Mediators are third-party advocates that sit with parents and helps them determine what is in the best interests of the children.
• Mediating and negotiating your child custody case, along with child support, outside the courtroom is faster and less costly than going through the courts.

Find more helpful articles and tips at http://www.fathershelphotline.com!

Taxes and Child Custody: Are Child Support Payments Tax Deductible?

Are child support payments tax deductible?

If they are court ordered as child support payments, no, they cannot be tax deductible.  On the flip side, the parent receiving the child support payments cannot claim the money as income, either.  Just as if you lived together, you couldn't claim the money you spend for clothes, food, and toys for your children on your taxes, and child support payments are considered with that same concept in mind.  However, if you package your child support payments to the court system as “family support” or “maintenance,” you can have your child support payments deducted from pre-tax dollars and then could easily claim the payments as a deduction to, in a sense, lower your child support payments.  Find out more on how to set up deductible child support payments here.

For more questions and answers regarding taxes and child custody, click here!

Understanding a Financial Power of Attorney

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A financial power of attorney (or POA) is giving another person or agent the authority to make financial decisions on their behalf. Normally, people get nervous over this thought. However, a person can assess the need of a financial power of attorneybased on his current lifestyle.

In doing this, there are valid reasons to consider for an issuance of a POA. A need must be determined before doing this. It must be noted that a power of attorney is a legal document that allows someone to conduct/implement business on your behalf. Therefore, confidence and trust to the person issued a power of attorney must be ensured. A power of attorney may come in as financial and medical.

A medical power of attorney must be have a specific information on who can make medical decisions in times that someone becomes incapacitated. During times of incapacity, this person will make decisions for you as you not able to make valid decisions for yourself. However, experts advise that financial powers of attorney should not include medical information.

On the other hand, a financial POA has two types, the durable and the non-durable. The difference of these two types of power of attorney must be very clear to the person doing this. In most cases, people use the durable powers of attorney in the event that a chronic illness is being involved or the future when it will be foreseen that such illness can be disruptive to the person. Regardless of what purpose there is, a person must ensure his security before issuing a POA.

Understanding a Will and How it Pertains to Fathers' Rights

Most fathers today are not fully educated on many issues governing their roles as the head of the family and their rights over their properties. Perhaps, it is about time for you to read The Fathers' Right Asset Protection Plan by Dennis Gac. This very comprehensive material enumerates critical issues and rights a father must assert. One of the focuses of this book is understanding the importance of a will.

Dying without a will is essentially the act of leaving all your assets and properties to the state. The danger here is that your valued possessions may be given to a person you distrust. To further document your intentions on how you want your wealth to be distributed when you pass away, it is recommended that you execute a will. Specifics like giving your vacation house at French Riviera to your eldest daughter, your ancestral house in Spain to your 2nd son will be enclosed with a will, or that 60% of your corporation be given to a chosen charitable institution.

More than the re-allocation of your assets, a will is very important when you have minor child or children. A will allows a parent to nominate a guardian who will be responsible of the minor's welfare. Although courts have the final say when talking about child custody, they would normally honor the deceased parents' wishes. Without a will, the state will be the one to nominate a guardian for the child. What is risky about this is your child may live with someone you do not completely trust, or, depending on the relatives and family around the area, they may end up being placed in foster care after your death. This typically goes against the standard wishes of parents, so naming someone as a guardian is an important thing to address in your will.

Specific Case Law Examples for Your Fathers' Rights Custody Case

When it comes to writing a compelling court argument, it is important that you reference certain case law and past cases that have dealt with similar issues. Here is a quick list of cases to reference and research further into to help you in pursuing your custody case pro se, whether you're on the defense or the offense:

Jarrett v. Jarrett (1982) 102 S. Ct 1388 - If dealing with an ex-wife that is attempting to terminate your rights as a father.

Craig v. Boren. 429 U.S. 190, 197-199 (1976) - Proof that the courts cannot subject men and women to disparate treatment. This case states that men and women cannot be treated unequally.

Roe v. Wade. 410 U.S. 113 (1972), 162-63 - Regarding the fundamental rights a parent has to care for their children.

Dunn v. Blumstein, 405 U.S. 330, 342 - Can be paired with the above Roe v. Wade as it is additional case law regarding fundamental rights of parents.

Pierce v. Society of Sisters, 268 U.S. 510, 534-35 (1925) - Case that proved fathers should be free from unreasonable State interference when raising their child/children.

Lehr v. Robertson 463 U.S. 248. *264: 103 S. Ct. 2985 - In regards to existence of substantial relationship as criterion in best interests of the child.

Meyer v. Nebraska, 262 U.S. 390, 399 (1923) - Proving the right the conceive and raise one's child

May v. Andersen. 345 U.S. 528. 533 (1953) - Proves that father's "rights far more precious...than property rights" when it comes to raising their children.

A little research into these case law references may help you with your father's rights case. There are a number of important cases, both locally and federally, that may assist you in protecting your rights as a father.

Dennis Gac is widely known as "The World's premier fathers rights Consultant!" But why would you care? Well, I'll tell you if you rush over to his site... I think you'll come to your own conclusion that he "IS" the real deal! Experience someone who works and thinks outside the box for you! Read what others have to say at.... http://www.fathershelphotline.com/.

No Child Support? No Car! New Ontario Law Starting Next Month

Next month, as of December 1st, a new Ontario, Canada law will be in effect that will allow local police the ability to impound vehicles of parents that fall behind on their child support and alimony payments.

But really, what good will this do?  In most cases, the reason payments are not being made is not becuase the parents are refusing to pay them, but because the parents can't afford to.  Take away the car they need in order to get to work every day, and you've just made a mountain out of a molehill.  Eliminating a parent's transportation to their job could cause them to lose their job, thus keeping them from being able to make any payments at all--it just makes the problem even worse.

In addition, when the Family Responsibility Office mishandles or loses a payment and someone's car is towed for all the wrong reasons, this can create quite the dilema for all involved.

In order for someone to modify their child support or alimony payments, they need to hire a lawyer, but if they can't pay a lawyer, they must pay the family support payments.  It creates a lose/lose situation for any parent in a financial bind.

Read more about this new upcoming law from the National Post.

Excellent Resource for State Statutes on Child Abuse and Neglect

When it comes to divorce and custody cases, sometimes the mothers of the children will falsely report allegations of child abuse, domestic abuse, or child neglect against the father in an attempt to gain legal leverage in their court case.  This can cause a horrible chain of events that can scar any good father for life, and create a headache when it comes to disproving the allegations.  There are, however, statutes in each state that can protect you and can assist you in getting legal, civil retribution to those who make these false claims and cause defamation to your name for the accused.

If you are looking for the specific statutes in regards to child abuse and neglect in your own home state, there is a wonderful resource at childwelfare.gov.  This site has a searchable database of state statutes and laws regarding the abuse and neglect of children.  This can be great for those of you preparing legal documents and needing to reference a specific state or federal statute in your paperwork.

Also, soon there will be a new, updated eBook called "The Fathers' Rights Guide to False Allegations of Abuse," which will include helpful information like this, and more, to those of you fighting for your defenses to be heard when accused of abuse that never actually happened.  Malicious moms around the world are known for making false accusations in order to gain headway in a messy custody case, so be sure you know your rights and ways to protect yourself from your ex causing additional drama and headache in an attempt to show you in a bad, unfavorable light for her own benefit.  Check out the fathershelphotline.com for information on obtaining the false allegations eBook, along with the other eBooks included in the collection of the Fathers' Rights Protection System.

Milwaukee's Fatherhood Summit in Wisconsin Makes the 5:00 News!

For men who have been fighting the system when it comes to getting custody and being a father in the court's eyes, it has been a difficult road.  Which is why one group in Milwaukee is stepping up and reaching out to fathers in need of moral support and assistance.

The Milwaukee Fatherhood Summit, themed "Empowered Fathers, Bridging the Gap," was a get-together for fathers of all ages and situations where they could come together, share their story and learn how to reverse bad credit, fix their driving records and catch up on child support back pay, helping them find success in the family courts.

As Terence Ray, the founder of the Milwaukee Fatherhood Initiative, stated in the following video, "Empower someone to put on his Superman cape, if you will, and knock down some of those obstacles, in fact, to be a better father."

For more information, you can read the story from Fox6Now.com or watch the embedded news story below.

What Happens During the Adoption Process if You're Left Out of the Paternity?

So here's a scenario for you--say you had a fling with a married woman.  You found out she was pregnant, she says you need to break up.  Down the road, you find out that she had the baby, and her and her husband signed the papers to allow the child to be adopted.  You have an inkling that the child was yours--what do you do now?

One Ohio father did what any biological father would want to do--he filed with the courts to establish paternity of the child, and then fought for his son back from the adoptive parents--three years after the baby boy was born.

The biological mother claimed her husband as the father--however, due to divorce, her and her husband signed over papers to allow the baby boy to be adopted--all of this was done without the true father's consent, and even though it is years later, he has the right to take his child back.

Read this man's story on ParentDish--and decide for yourself--when adoption agencies collect and gather information about the parents of the baby, should they do a paternity test as well to establish them as the true parents to avoid situations such as this one?

Trend of 50/50 Custody is Growing

Holly Davis, a family lawyer in Austin, Texas, has released information that shows that 50/50 joint physical custody is becoming a more popular trend in America today.

"You're definitely seeing more 50/50 custody situations, and I think that's attributed in large part to changing gender roles," says Davis.  "More women are pursuing careers, and more men are choosing to focus on their children."

This is a great thing to hear; however, it does not mean that 50/50 physical custody arrangements are a good fit for every family.  Some circumstances may make it difficult or impossible, such as location of the parents, the communicative abilities of both parents, and the willingness for each parent to be a positive influence on the children instead of causing arguments and negative energy whenever the kids are dropped off or picked up by the other parent.  Just like there is no cookie-cutter divorce, there will never be a cookie-cutter custody arrangement that works for every family.

Read more about Holly Davis' findings on PRWeb.com!

Joel Leyden Speaks Out

YouTube is a wonderful place for dads all around the world to speak their mind about the pain and suffering they are dealing with when it comes to being separated from their children.

I have no words for this.  Joel Leyden from Isreal pours his heart out in this YouTube video.

UK Dads Dress as Superheroes to Combat the Child Support Agency

Stourbridgenews.co.uk

Costumes aren't just for Halloween--they're for superheroes, too--superheroes like fathers!

A number of dads from the "New Fathers 4 Justice" group stood outside the Child Support Agency in Waterfront dressed as Superman, Batman, and even the pope to help make a point--fathers deserve better rights to their children, and the chance to be dads.  

Read more about the demonstration at Stourbridge News!

Chicago-based Father Fights for Custody from Non-Related Couple

Earlzell Orr, the father of an 11-year-old boy in Chicago, Illinois, is headed to court today to fight for custody from a non-related couple that gained temporary, emergency custody after the death of his mother. 

Orr is fighting to get custody of his son since the court has not yet granted temporary or permanent possession of the child, but yet they have access to the mother's bank accounts which is where the child support payments have been deposited.  One of the adults given emergency custody is also a convicted felon, and attorneys specializing in fathers' rights are petitioning for custody on behalf of Orr.

Our thoughts are with Orr as he fights for what he rightfully deserves--his son!

For more information regarding this court date, see the full press release here.

WCCO Article Discussing the Shift in Family Courts

When it comes to divorce and custody cases in the family law courtroom, it seems that there has been a substantial shift that gives fathers a new "edge" against their wives when it comes to getting custody of their children.  

Minnesota's WCCO News anchor Jason DeRusha recently delved into the amazing shift happening in family law courtrooms, the fact that judges are loosening up in terms of their "biased" favoritism of women who come forward, wanting sole custody of their children.

Pamela Waggoner of the Minnesota Bar Association, stated, "I think it's a reflection of a change in society. You no longer have the traditional family unit where there's one breadwinner and one stay at home parent. Right now, you have two people -- where both people work,"  No longer can anyone rule in favor of the "tender years doctrine," which claimed younger children were automatically better off with their mother due to the care-taking responsibilities that mothers once had as stay-at-home moms and homemakers.

To read more about this amazing breakthrough in family law, check out the WCCO article by Jason DeRusha here.

"Why? Because She Wears a Skirt and I Don't." -Bob Norton, MA

Bob Norton
clevelenterprises.com

Bob Norton of Massachuessets has been burned in the past with a horrible divorce that resulted in little, limited custody with his children.  His divorce has left him to file bankruptcy, give up his pre-marital home, and also left him in the situation of an unfair court order for child custody and visitation.  As he stated in his video taken during the ACFC (American Coalition for Fathers and Children) Conference on September 15, 2006:

"And so now I see my children about two hours a week under supervised visitation because my wife, who has had a 15-year emotional instability history and psychiatric treatment and is on drugs for mood control, suffers from four or five different symptoms and conditions that sometimes converge, has complete control of my children.  Why?  Because she wears a skirt and I don't.  That's how the systems work today--the judges are overloaded, they rubber stamp, they go to lunch, and that's a higher priority than getting justice and getting whats best for the children."  (See YouTube video below for full audio)

Recently, there has been news from Boston.com that Massachusetts State Senator Cynthia Creem has been "attacked" by Bob Norton, who runs and maintains the website FathersUnite.org.  He has reportedly been distributing flyers around the area that claim Creem is attempting to "block legislation that would reform state alimony laws."  This comes about because she is also a divorce attorney, and the purpose of the flyer is to encourage others to not vote for Creem during the September primaries.  She claims that the information on the flyer is untrue, is not based on any fact, and although disparaging, is looking forward to running for re-election for the 13th year as state Senate.

Best-Selling Author Louis de Bernieres Shares his Story of Despair

Louisdebernieres.co.uk

Known for penning the book "Captain Corelli's Mandolin," Louis de Bernieres has come public about how his recent family split has caused him a great deal of depression and despair due to his limited access to his children.

Living in the United Kingdom, de Bernieres revealed the pain and depression his parter Cathy Gill caused him after taking custody of their two children, ages five and two, and limiting the access he had to them.  This led him to become a patron of Families Need Fathers (or FNF).

In an article with Emily Andrews, de Bernieres states:

"It was really dreadful...the worst thing, practically, was finding the house so quiet, because it was always so full of laughter and rampaging and stampeding.  There was always a lot of noise and fun, and it suddenly went quiet...the emotional desolation is hard to describe.  There were many times when I felt suicidal.  One of the most extreme things you feel is a fantastically deep, bitter, anger at being treated so outrageously."

This is a perfect example of the rights fathers need and should have in the courtroom when it comes to their children.  The effect of losing one's children can be devastating, and de Bernieres is publicly speaking out about how the break up affect not only the kids but him as a father.

Rob Hahn's Candidacy Lost Due to Restraining Order Issued During Divorce?

RobBobforGov.com

Rob Hahn, resident of St. Paul and former candidate for governor, recently lost his Independence Party campaign against competitor Tom Horner.  To some, this comes as no surprise, after he spread the information of his restraining order against his wife during their divorce case one year back.  Hahn was recently interviewed by Gail Rosenblum of the Star Tribune, and confessed to his mistake and lack of anger management in the situation:

"It was a horrible mistake that I want to help others going through similar situations avoid making...ironically, I'm in a good position to do so because of my own experiences."

In his interview with Rosenblum, he continued to talk about how what he did was not okay, and the steps he has taken in anger management to help him better prepare himself for other stressful situations that may arise.

Dayton, Ohio Adoption Case Strengthening Father's Rights for their Children

In Dayton, Ohio, one case regarding an adopted two-year-old girl has brought national attention to adoption rules and how the "system" works when it comes to a father's rights to their children and their ability to stop adoption proceedings that occur without their okay.

The article from The Columbus Dispatch quotes Susan Eisenman, an adoption lawyer from the Upper Arlington area: "I don't think it's hit people yet just how persuasive this might be...if the guy doesn't want the adoption to go forward, all he has to do is file a paternity suit."

This might be a big step for fathers' rights in the eyes of the adoption industry.  Read more here!

--National Brotherhood of Fathers' Rights

Ricard Martinez of Racine, Wisconsin Camps Outside Courthouse to Encourage Others to Join for Fathers' Rights Rally

JournalTimes.com photo, Ricardo
Martinez stands up for fathers' rights!

Let down by the courthouse a number of times in his own divorce and fathers' rights case, Ricardo Martinez, 34, of Racine, Wisconsin is now unemployed, homeless, and rallying for his kids from outside the Racine County Courthouse.  He's been burned by the courthouse, as have other fathers before him, when it comes to custody and visitation of his kids, and he's not going to take it quietly!

("Father Camping Out by Courthouse, Advertising Rally" Article by JournalTimes.com can be found here)

Wednesday, August 18th, 2010, outside of the Racine County Courthouse at 9 a.m., 730 Washington Avenue, Martinez will be joined by at least 150 fathers protesting the courthouse for their choice in distanting fathers from their children.  In fact, Martinez also rallied back in March by carrying a homemade wooden cross around the courthouse for a week.

All I have to say is, GO RICARDO!  If enough fathers step up to the plate to have their voices heard, perhaps the courts will understand that parenting is a two-person job, and requires BOTH the Mother and the Father to have equal time and justice!

National Brotherhood of Fathers' Rights is on Facebook! Come Join Us!

As some of you may have already noticed, we're on Facebook!  Please, check us out, "like" us, and spread the love to your friends--invite everyone you know that believes that both parents are best to join our cause!  Fathers have rights, too, and the more people know, the more they will understand the importance of fatherhood in every child's life!  Hopefully, down the line, we can all band together to eliminate sexism in the courtroom and show that a child with their father in their lives is the best possible outcome of any divorce!  Click the link below to go to our Facebook fan page to "like" us and share with the ones you love!

National Brotherhood of Fathers' Rights on Facebook!

Thank you for your continued support!